The friend zone

So I have been hearing a lot about this friend zone...it's the place you don't want to end up with a girl that you are into. It seems like such an easy trap to fall into. When you are the nice guy, the one she can come to and talk to, the one who will listen, the one who will go out with her and do stuff, it seems like you are giving her enough of you that she has no need to enter into a serious relationship with you. She gets the benefit of YOU without having to give much of anything.

Now that's not to say that you don't get anything out of being a friend of a girl you like, but what you get is much different than what you want.

It seems like this kind of relationship sends a few different signals that lead to fail. First off, you seem to be telling her that you are happy. That you are enjoying your time with her. While that's true, that isn't the end result of your efforts, it's the side effect. You want to show her how awesome you are and how well you compliment her. All she can see, though, is that you are benefiting her, she likes it and that seems to be your intention since you appear to be at peace with it.

Second, this kind of relationship sends the signal that you enjoy the role you are playing and that makes it easier for her to PUT you in that role in HER mind.

Third, it shows that you are willing to give an insane amount of yourself to her in exchange for little. This tells her that she is valuable, awesome, exceptional, special, etc. It tells her that she is so valuable, awesome, exceptional, special, etc., that she doesn't NEED to do ANYTHING in order to keep the benefits coming. On her end, she can reap all of these benefits without having to do any work.

Ultimately, what it comes down to is that a woman will get SO MUCH good stuff from a guy who is trying to get her attention and show how good he fits, while doing nothing to earn it besides being awesome, that she will have NO INCENTIVE to give back. That hurts. A lot. And before you know it, you are a friend and since she has labeled you as such, the killer line is played:

"I don't want to risk losing you as a friend"

She values the friendship. You value the potential relationship. They are different.

How do you prevent going into the friend zone. And once you are there, is there a way out?